Susan Writes

During the twelve years that I’ve taken my van to be serviced, I’ve learned the routine.  Tell the service technician the current mileage and explain any problems, and that I’ll wait.

            I look for a quiet place to read a book, make a phone call, watch people, and sometimes write notes for a column. Maybe because my dad owned a service station when I was a kid, I like the smells and feel of a car garage and dealership.

And I like the uninterrupted hour – unless there’s a repair needed and then the service tech explains what needs to be done.  I’m not completely ignorant of vehicle terms. Dad allowed me to drive alone only after I could change a tire and check the oil, and he told me about anti-freeze, belts, hoses, brake pads, filters, and windshield wipers. 

            Recently while getting my van serviced, Bryan, the service tech, found me in a corner of the sales department.  He noticed air pods in my ears and spoke quietly: “Don’t get off the phone. This’ll just take a minute.”  Bryan moved a chair close to mine, sat down, leaned forward, and put his elbows on his knees.

“We can’t rotate your tires today because you’ve got swollen lug nuts.”

Rotate tires, I understood. 

Swollen lug nuts, I didn’t.   

I told my friend on the phone that I’d call back.  I frowned and said, “Okay.”

“So, your lug nuts are swollen and if we take then off, we probably can’t get them back on the wheels.”

When Dad taught me to change a tire, I’m sure he told me to use a lug wrench to remove the lug nuts, and that’s probably the last time I’ve heard the words lug nuts. 

“Okay,” I said.

“So, all four tires have swollen lug nuts. We don’t have that many. I’ll have to order them.” 

“Okay.” I tried to get a mental picture of a swollen lug nut. 

“That’s the cost to order them.” Bryan circled a dollar amount on a paper clipped to his clipboard.

“Okay,” I said for the fourth time.

“Well, you might check the cost somewhere or discuss it with someone. Driving with swollen lug nuts for a while isn’t a problem.”

 “So, you’re saying I might want to discuss with my husband about ordering lug nuts somewhere?”  I asked.  Bryan nodded.

Husband was leaving our house just as I got home.  “Wait,” I said. “I didn’t get the tires rotated because the van has swollen lug nuts.”  He raised his eyebrows, grinned, but didn’t laugh out loud.   

The next day Husband told me that he and our 18-year-old Grand, a car guy, had laughed and that he’d said, “Surely your gran didn’t hear right and misunderstood.” 

            But Husband googled swollen lug nuts and then called Bryan to ask, “What’s the problem with

the tires?”  Husband admitted that I’d heard correctly.

No matter the cost to replace my van’s lug nuts, it’s worth every penny.  Who else has a story about swollen lug nuts?

Filed under: Everyday Life | Tagged: swollen lug nut |